I’m Stuck

I am writing my dissertation proposal. I know boat loads about my topic. When I go out for my run every day, I practically write chapters in my head. But I can’t seem to get my proposal done. I have a lot on paper, but I am convinced it’s all in the wrong order or it’s not clever enough or convincing enough or it lacks clarity. I read what I have and think what exquisite crap I have committed to the page. And all of this self-loathing has given me the proverbial writer’s block. I am frozen in place. I’ve tried my usual tricks: do housework, re-organize my office, torture my family with endless moaning about my lack of writing skill, go running, do yoga, listen to loud music, soft music, classical, rap, country, sit in silence. Nothing is working. Lest I spend the remainder of my days searching the internet for funny Sarah Palin videos with glassy eyes and drool leaking out the side of my mouth, I have to find a solution quick.

Then I read this blog by Jonathan Bellman, The Writer in the Mirror and another one by Phil Ford, Adventures in Bad Writing. And I was reminded that, even though I think me and my problems are pretty darn special, I am not unusual. I am not even in an unusual spot. I am not the only with the hair shirt and I won’t be the last. 

So I kind of feel better. Still wish I could make a lit. review flow and that my thoughts would magically reorganize themselves on paper and sound “wicked smaht.” In the meantime, I’ll just keep doing laundry and know that I have company.

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